No signal

When I was fifteen, we made a trip to the mainland during summer break to visit my family. On this trip, I went fishing with my cousins at a nearby lake. They told me that if I touched the water in the lake I would get gonorrhea. Believing them, I stayed as far from the water as I could, yet still fishing. (In hindsight, why would I keep fishing for fish in gonorrhea water? no idea.) Finally, my cousin, Will, taking advantage of my gullibility grabbed me and threw me into the lake. Gross. I thought that was it for me. Then I realized that my phone was in my back pocket and it had died in the water. It couldn't have gotten worse than that. Forget STD's—A day without my phone! Impossible.

Today, I change my mind. In fact, I wish someone would throw me in that lake. Throw my phone in there, too. Leave me alone in the lake with my phone. Yes. That would be nice.